


I'm a Doctor

by wonker8



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: M/M, Misunderstandings, Orpheus - Freeform, Spoiler for into Darkness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-24
Updated: 2013-05-24
Packaged: 2017-12-12 21:03:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,164
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/816040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wonker8/pseuds/wonker8
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>5 times Bones wasn't what Kirk was looking for and one time he was.</p><p>***Spoiler for STID***</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm a Doctor

**Author's Note:**

> Fill for this [prompt](http://strek-id-kink.livejournal.com/1695.html?thread=182431#t182431) in the strek-id-kink meme.
> 
> Spoilers ahoy!

1\. Academy Days  
“Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor! Not a stripper!”

The entire cafeteria went quiet at the loud exclamation. But instead of acknowledging them, Leonard continued on, scowling. “I am not going to your party when I have two exams coming up, and I will not be putting on a strip show. Especially not to pick up a girl!”

“But Bones,” Jim whined, giving his best friend the puppy eyes. “Girls love it when hot guys like you and me take it off! And you won't be doing it alone. We'll put on a show together! It'll be hot and steamy and lots of fun!”

Leonard crossed his arms and glared. “I will do no such thing. Get yourself a new best friend.”

Five hours later, Leonard found himself at Jim's party, wondering what the hell happened to his brain to agree to this (and reminding himself that he has two exams the next day). At least Jim found another person to strip with (He just hoped that he didn't find himself a new best friend).

2\. Before the 3rd Kobayashi Maru Test.  
Leonard stared at his best friend in disbelief. “You want me to what?!” he exclaimed.

“Well, it's just speculations for now,” Jim said, throwing back his drink with a grace that a drunk should not have. “But when I do get my own ship and become a Captain, I want you to be my right hand.”

“Dammit Jim! I don't have that kind of training! I'm a doctor, not a first officer! I can't fill in that kind of role when I'm too busy saving your ass for medical purposes!” Leonard exclaimed, putting his glass of brandy down harshly, causing the drink to splash. The bartender glared at him, but he had better things to worry about.

“You're naggy enough,” Jim said, pointing at his best friend with a lazy finger. “It'll be perfect.”

“Except for the part where I'm in the Medical Bay and you're on the Bridge,” Leonard spat.

“Details,” was the flippant answer he received before Jim drank down another shot.

“I'm your best friend. People will call it favoritism.”

“So?”

“Jim, you can't be serious!”

“Try it out with the Kobayashi Maru Test,” Jim said. “Be my First Mate.”

Leonard would have been lying if he said he wasn't flattered. But this was something a little beyond him. He would never tell Jim how grateful he was that Jim thought of him that highly, however.

3\. Random Mission After the Nero Incident  
“And then he has the gulls to say that I'm not being proper as a Captain because I ignored one tiny protocol! One! It made sure that we got out of there safely, didn't it? So why the hell does he always give me crap about this?” Jim ranted. He paced back and forth in Leonard's office, fuming.

Any normal time, this would have been fine. They would both crack open a drink and rant about the annoying Vulcan until they passed out or had alcohol poisoning or whatever. But today was not the day. Leonard had two near-death patients that he brought back (no help from the Captain, mind you) and a pregnant crewmember scheduled to give birth tomorrow. He didn't have time to deal with Jim's emotional mess.

“Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor, not a counselor! If you have so much problem with that pointy eared bastard, go talk to him, for Pete's sake!”

“But then he's just going to give me that look of 'no-nonsense' and recite protocols at me,” Jim whined, before pouting like a child. “Why can't he just understand that I just want to be friends?”

It was a pathetic display that Leonard knew better to poke fun of. Because in that simple question was a longing that wasn't strictly platonic. His heart hurt (must be from the stress) and he was feeling the beginnings of a migraine (Damn Jim and his stupid crush). He kicked Jim out of his office without another word, ignoring the way jealousy stabbed at his heart.

4\. Volcano Incident  
“Jim, I'm not beaming down there,” Leonard stated, putting his foot down and crossing his arms.

“Why not? It'll be fun,” Jim said, giving Leonard a charming smile.

“Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor, not a member of your landing party! I can't be down there and take care of sick people up here at the same time.”

“Let someone else take care of it,” he answered, waving his hand in the air. “I need my best friend with me down there. Besides, what if I find something I'm allergic to down there? I'm going to need my best friend's help, you know.”

There was logic in what Jim was saying but Leonard did not like this at all. “And that won't happen as long as you keep your hands to yourself. You don't need me down there at all, Jim. I'm not going to be useful at all!”

He was right, of course. But dammit, it felt good to be by Jim's side, even if it was to run away from angry tribal men.

5\. Khan  
His hands trembled as he reached forward for the zipper of the bag. He moved slowly, moving the zipper down one tooth at a time. The blond locks were revealed first. Then the pale face. Then the peaceful look on his friend's face that looked as if Jim was just sleeping. Just sleeping.

Suddenly, there wasn't enough air on the Enterprise. Leonard stumbled to a chair and collapsed. He was aware of others near him, crying and consoling one another. But he... He had no one left now. His wife had taken the whole damned planet in the divorce and all he had for the past four years had been Jim.

“Dammit Jim,” he whispered, his voice so hoarse that it was more of a croak than actual speech. “I'm a doctor, not Orpheus. I can't follow you to Hades to bring you back.” _Even if I love you enough to not turn back to look at you._

+1.  
Their mouths pull apart slowly, leaving a thin trail of saliva connecting them before that snapped. Leonard looked at Jim, uncertain how to react to this situation, but the Captain just grinned.

“Took us long enough, eh?”

“Jim... I'm not Spock.”

Confusion marred the blond's face as he looked at Leonard. “Yeah, that's sort of the point.”

“I'm not Spock and I will not be his replacement. Dammit Jim, I'm Leonard McCoy and I'm not going to play second fiddle-”

“Bones! I mean it. It's you. It's always been you. I won't have anyone but you.”

Leonard looked down at the ground. “But I'm never what you're looking for. I'm not a stripper, your first officer, a counselor, a member of your landing party, or Orpheus. I'm just... a doctor.”

“And you're perfect, Leonard. Exactly what the Captain ordered.”

Jim smirked again before pulling Leonard into another kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> Just as a side note, Orpheus was a Greek musician, whose beloved wife Eurydice passed away. To get her back, he journeyed to the Underworld and made a deal with Hades. If Orpheus could take Eurydice to the mortal land without looking back at her, then she will live. Unfortunately, he looked back.


End file.
